When You Call Me a Hurtful Nickname

This week, a child who I don’t know very well called me a hurtful name, ‘Deaf F—–‘ (Rhymes with Maggot).’ Instead of staying upset at him (he later apologized), I wrote “The Power of a Name.” You are welcome to share this with anyone you think it may help.

#StopHearingLossBullying _Final Logo


Before you continue to call me by a nickname, consider the power behind it.

When you continue to call me Jerk, I may begin to see myself this way and, instead of becoming a nicer person, I will believe I am a jerk and continue to treat you this way.

When you continue to call me Stupid, I might let that word sink to my core and influence my thoughts and choices for the rest of my life.

When you continue to call me Slob, I likely will not pick up after myself any faster but instead will give up trying.

When you continue to call me Slow, I may try to increase my mental or physical speed to the point of irreparable exhaustion.

When you continue to call me Loser, I may choose only to disappoint your expectations.

When you continue to call me Crazy, I may let that sink into my mind and never leave.

When you call me by the name printed on my birth certificate, or the name I wish was on my birth certificate, I know that you know who I am—a Person instead of a nickname.

When you continue to call me by my name, you will get my attention. When you refuse to use a nickname, you may gain my trust.

If you have ever called me by a nickname that is hurtful and you tell me you are truly sorry, you may even earn my respect.

Forget the nickname.

Call me by my name.

-Shanna Groves

To learn more about hearing loss, deafness, and the importance of refraining from hurtful words, visit Lipreading Mom’s Stop Hearing Loss Bullying page.


13 thoughts on “When You Call Me a Hurtful Nickname

  1. Wonderful post, Shanna! How many of us still remember the names we were called as children and how that has affected us for a lifetime!

    RJ ThesmanAuthor / Certified Life Coach

    Website: http://www.rjthesman.net Facebook Author Page: http:www.facebook.com/RJThesman?fref=ts Twitter: http://@rjthesman LinkedIn: http://linkd.in/12rvi7s Facebook Group: http://on.fb.me/15XgKN4

    Finding Hope When Life Unravels

    Date: Fri, 22 Aug 2014 16:02:11 +0000 To: rjthesman@yahoo.com

  2. Hi Shanna, lovely post and straight to my heart as someone who has experienced bullying all through comprehensive school and even in adult life.

    I have just shared this on my Facebook page and would love to, with your permission, share your poem with my blog readers on Liz’s deaf blog, which I will link back to this original post.

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